Terminator Salvation and Christian Bale

I wouldn’t say I’m a “fan” of Christian Bale, but I did enjoy him in movies like American Psycho, The Machinist, The Prestige and even Batman Begins, but the more I watch him lately I’m coming to the conclusion that he’s just not a good actor. Ok, ok, I know that Terminator Salvation was not the greatest movie in the world and McG apparently can’t direct his way out of a paper bag, but even the lines that Bale spoke in this movie were just ridiculous.

Terminator Salvation is the 4th film in the series and follows John Connor (Bale) as he tries to rescue Kyle Reese from being killed by the machines, which he has to succeed in doing since Kyle Reese is his father and if he doesn’t survive then Connor cannot send Reese back in time to protect his mother and subsequently knock her up. I get a headache sometimes when trying to piece together everything that has happened in the Terminator series because some of it just doesn’t make sense, like where does Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles fit in to all of this?

But anyways, the movie itself wasn’t very good, it wasn’t the worst thing I’ve seen this year, but it wasn’t good. And my biggest complaint about it isn’t even the directing, but the fact that they tried way to hard to pay homage to the past Terminator flicks. I can think of a few instances off the top of my head where they just stole scenes or lines from the previous films. For example, when Marcus Wright first meets Kyle Reese, the first thing Reese says to him is “Come with me if you want to live”, which was uttered by Arnold in part 2 and I believe it was also said by Reese in part 1 (it’s been a while since I’ve seen the original). Then there is scene where Reese and Wright are trying to escape from motorcycle Terminators. Reese and Wright are driving in a modified big rig trying to get away when they notice that the one motorcycle has disappeared, but of course it reappears as it jumps off a bridge and lands in front of the truck they are driving. This is exactly the same as in Terminator 2 when John Connor is being chased by the T-1000 and Arnold takes his bike off the bridge, landing in front of the semi truck. Then of course we get John Connor playing “You Could Be Mine” by Guns N Roses to try to lure out a motorcycle terminator and of course that song was the theme song of the T2. We also get to see him use the sweet computer hacking skills he learned from T2 and hacking ATM machines, to gain access to skynet later in the movie. There are also multiple instances of single handed shotgun pumps which of course Sarah Connor made popular in T2 and the use of molten steel to destroy a Terminator, even the catwalk/shotgun scene in “Salvation” is almost identical to the same scene at the end of T2. It just seemed like they were trying way to hard to make this movie something that it wasn’t. And from what I read, the early leaks of the script were fairly decent, but some how something got lost in translation. Whether that was the director wanting to take things in a different direction or just the director fucking up based on the writing, I don’t know, but the final product is not something I would be proud of.

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Street Fighter: The Legend of Chun-Li

This movie showed up in my mail box yesterday fro Netflix and I kind of wish it hadn’t. Kristin Kreuk of Smallville fame, stars in this “reinvention” of the Street Fighter movies, and honestly they should have just stuck with the original Van Dame version. So the story follows Chun-Li as she grows up learning to fight and play the piano, her father is eventually kidnapped by M. Bison, who looks nothing like the character in the video games, and it’s up to her to leave her life of luxury and track down Gen, the man that will teach her how to defeat Bison. Chris Klein also makes an appearance in this flick, it may be his first movie since Rollerball, which has got to be one of the worst movies ever made. Moon Bloodgood also has a role, but I couldn’t really tell what her job was other than to look hot, and that was fine with me.

Obviously I went into this expecting nothing but maybe a few nice shots of Kristin Kreuk and Moon Bloodgood, but what I got was the worst performance of any actor I’ve seen lately in Chris Klein. At one point I stopped even caring about whether or not Chun-Li was going to save her father and defeat Bison, so long as I could see Chris Klein yell “Nash, out” into another walkie talkie. And what’s with Michael Clark Duncan taking all these shitty roles lately? Didn’t the man win some sort of award for The Green Mile? And now he’s playing Balrog in a street fighter movie? Wow, talk about a fall from grace, dude needs to get a new agent or something. And what’s with the Black Eyed Peas being cast in these types of movies lately. Vega is played by Taboo from the BEP’s and even in the small role he has, he’s pretty terrible. He even wears a mask for most of the movie and is still bad. And earlier this year we were blessed with Will I Am.’s role in Wolverine. And obviously we’ve seen Fergie in a few movies (Planet Terror, Poseidon) but she’s kinda hot in a paper bag sort of way so I’ll let that one slide. The only one we haven’t seen in a movie is “that other guy”, I don’t even know his name to be honest, I think it’s apple be bop or something, but anyways, nobody cares.

Chun-Li was a pretty terrible movie in general, the fight scenes were bad, the acting was bad, the storyline itself was pretty terrible and the casting was pretty bad. I think the only good casting was Michael Clark Duncan as Balrog, that was pretty spot on, but Bison is not a 5 foot 6 blond guy with blue eyes that wears a black suit constantly. And then there’s Chris Klein… you know that gurgling you get in your stomach after you eat something that doesn’t agree with you and then you spend 20 minutes in the bathroom fixing the problem? Well that “problem” that you just flushed down the toilet can probably act better than Chris Klein.

If you’re curious, check it out, but don’t expect too much except for some eye candy in Kristin and Moon, other than that you’re in for a treat when “Nash” is on screen. Did anyone else see this pile of shit? What did you guys think? I honestly didn’t think the original Street Fighter with Jean Claude Van Dame and all those other guys was that terrible, I mean it’s not a good movie by any means, but I feel like it was more entertaining than this latest attempt. I can’t see how any sequels are going to get green lit for this, but we’ll see.

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